Incite Full

At work the past few days, I’ve gotten lost in some random thoughts. After having a conversation with a friend about over thinking things. Some people over think relationships, or their job, or decisions that need to be made. Not I, however.

Today while listening to some music, I heard what must be music’s greatest sin. I’m talking about something worse than a great group ceasing to use heroin leading to a decline in lyrical awesomeness and melodic magnificence. I’m talking about the dreaded, and I shudder thinking about it, fade out. It’s like falling asleep to a book on tape, or knowing that the band didn’t care enough about the song to finish it properly.

So I got to thinking, what is the best song with the worst ending? I’m still trying to figure it out, but will let you know when I do. Suggestions are welcome.

Also, in a meeting yesterday I heard the following statement: “I’m sorry, my brain must be thrashing.”

If you follow that link, it’s a term used to describe what happens to a computer when it is constantly reading from disk and not memory. I know, nerdy. But this guy used the sentence, and what’s more- no one batted an eye. It was like common lingo or terminology in this group. I wasn’t sure what to think at first. Then I realized I don’t ever want to become like that. Sure, nerdiness to a certain extent is a badge of honor- like winning bar trivia. Not this, though. This was not cool.

I’m currently watching the Simpson’s movie. And it feels very forced, unfunny.

Something else I’ve thought about is that one could probably get away waisting 60% of their time. If anyone were to ever call you on it, you could just blame meetings and bureaucratic blunders for the lack of work getting done. Now this isn’t a very ethical way of getting through life, but I think it is the norm.It seems, from other places I’ve worked, as if they expect you to waste half your time until you realize that you need to get shit done.

Then it’s a week of insane work which one complains about non-stop for being “overworked.” How ridiculous.

Ok. We get it. It was your first earth quake- and a 5.8, not a bad beginning. Things can only get better, right? What i do not need is footage of the event. Especially lame footage accompanied by a ‘cute’ one liner.

I’ve seen footage of bike shops, swimming pools, and even wine bottles breaking. The horror! There is something about shit moving unexpectedly that gets people, much like cats, excited. This was not a 9.0-  desks were not flying across the room, people were not killed (which i a good thing)- but now I have to listen to everyone tell their earthquake story- Oh yeah? You were on the phone and you actually said “I think I have to go- We’re having an earthquake.” How about you? Oh, you were sitting on a bench? You don’t say!

This accompanied by the woman who said it was “Beautiful” just really make me weep for humanity. It’s over.  I don’t care if you have security footage of a restroom or a bunch of people running outside.

Seriously.

Ok, enough of that. Today the weekend begins, and i’m pretty excited for it. Batman again, Saddle Ranch, coffee, out, surfing, and Saturday night, which I have no plans for as of yet, but I’m sure I can think of something to do. Lets do it.

“I used to sleep nude – until the earthquak”

So when I first started using my MBP, I felt like an old man, unable to figure out the smallest things with ease. Thinking, like Brian had said, that the next 3 years of my life would be a terrible nightmare, almost as bizarre as the one I had which had me fleeing from a deranged hotel guest who was attempting to shave my head. That is a completely true dream that I had about 2 nights ago.

But I digress, I feel pretty comfortable with the thing now. I wouldn’t say it’s better, as much as it is prettier. you feel better about doing mundane tasks, as exemplified by my fist/terrorist pound upon sending an email. I’m still working on finding better notepad editors which are free- we all love vim, it’s true, but Jesus I could use some better syntax highlighting.

What is going to kill me, is the time line for my evening. I get home, and I’m going to eat and run, in either order, and then go out a bit. Then we’ll meet for the movie and watch it. Normally this is where I’d go home and go t sleep. But I’ve got to drive in and do some overtime at 5:30 in the morning! Hopefully I’ll make it, but regardless I’ll probably just be thinking about batman the entire time. You’ll get an entry on it, too! Lucky you!

I thought I was running out of material to write about, but I took a quick peek at CNN and have a new topic to write about: Shut the Fuck up, Glen Beck.

Here is what he wrote about the wearing of now famous Che Guevara T-shirts:

That’s right, the same T-shirts you see Hollywood celebrities, starving pseudo-artists and confused hipster teens wearing around local coffee shops. To all those who decide that you want to be coffee house communist-chic, remember this: When you are wearing a Che T-shirt, you’re wearing the same shirt that makes terrorists believe you’re just one of the gang. I hope that latte is tasty.

Are you fucking kidding me? First of all, I’d think commercializing this man would be the best thing for you- to throw in his anti-capitalist face something he was fighting against. Secondly, why does a person wearing the Che shirt have to be confused? Just because you don’t agree with it doesn’t make it wrong. And are you still picking on expensive coffee drinkers? That’s about as entertaining as remembering the Y2k crisis. For fucks sake, man, it’s 2008, and you still think only college kids and people who waste time spend it in coffee shops. Get off your god damn high horse.

Your argument is what? Isn’t this in the same vein as “if you do drugs, you’re supporting Osama Bin Laden?” Christ almighty, that’s original. Buy this shirt and you’ll support terrorists. Are you really extrapolating, from a story about t-shirts, the argument that FARC rebels representing all terrorists? I’m convinced that the reason he wrote this article, besides lack of intelligence, is because some “hipster” teen in front of him got the last scone at Starbucks.

And that “wisecrack” at the end about capitalism always winning? Way to say stupid shit when people are losing their home due to predatory loan rates. You should run for office. I’m well aware that there is a lot of blame to pass around here, but ‘capitalism,’ as you’re trumpeting it, is about as real as communism is and was.

He even goes on to ask why, if Che is so great, did Barack Obama not “approve of its use,” referring to a flag hung in one of the volunteer offices. I’ve got the answer for you: because fucking morons like yourself have a need to exploit and fear monger the public. The only reason you have a job, Glen, is because the rest of the world is blind enough to read and agree. Shit, did I say read? I meant watch. And getting Barack Obama to disapprove of communism is like getting water to stay wet, and I can think of a handful of lefties out there that would make better examples.

Do I approve of the shirt? No. Do I approve of Che? Not in the slightest, but wearing the Che shirt really says nothing, much like buying Campbell’s soup does not mean you’re a fan of Andy Warhol. Sometimes you’re just fucking hungry.

I apologize for the rant, and how poorly structured it is, but I just can’t stand this man and his dumbassedness sometimes.

While it’s true I am an open book- anything you want to know about me I’ll probably tell you- you still need to open the book and read. I’m not going to wear my emotions on my sleeve. I’m not going to cry or mope around when I’m sad. I’m not going to throw a vase at the wall when I’m angry. Apparently I will write, though. But I always do that.

I invited some friends out here last night for a small gathering. These were all friends I hadn’t seen in a while, from school or other, non-work related channels. To be sure, I sent some text messages out to remind people and asked when they were coming. The trouble wasn’t brewing when only one person responded, it was marinating.

What’s fucked up, though, is the fact that I had been talking to people about this for a while. People said they were coming. Good friends, or at least I thought. About 8 hours after the event I got a text message saying “hey what’s up ” from one of the people who was supposed to come. Fuck. That. Shit.

I had been, and still am, pretty upset about this, to be honest. I thought it was shitty of them to do this or simply not care enough to tell me what they were doing. It’s especially shitty when you show up to their party a week prior to hang out with them, because you have not seen them in a while.

Who knows, maybe I did something or said something stupid that night. But I doubt it. Or if I did, man up and tell me.

What’s most infuriating about it, however, is that I expected it to happen. What do you say when people don’t disappoint you by disappointing you? It’s happened before- whether it be dinner or just hanging out. Getting coffee or seeing a movie. Well, all I can say is that I’m done. I’m at the point in my life where i’m not going to try and make things work if there is no added value. There has to be a fucking return on investment in any relationship. I feel like this friendship, the one I’m thinking about most intently, is a bear market, and I’m selling.

And it makes me feel like shit to say and think these things. But i need to. And who knows, maybe you’re even reading this, to which I say, I’m sorry.

I’m sorry this isn’t funny, smart, clever, creative, sad, angry, or depressing enough. I’m sorry it’s not said in person, but lets be honest, that might take a while to set up. So here you go. Here we all go. This is my walk off home run of relationships. This is my encore of friendliness.

Good bye.

“A true friend stabs you in the front” Oscar Wilde

Once and a while i stumble upon a gem of a quote- something that isn’t famous, just something someone actually said. And this one is a keeper. No, not because it’s inspiring, or great, or evil- it’s jsut so easily contradicted.

the quote said was “If you’re amazing in the eyes of one person, well, that’s really all that matters.” Oh really? Because i think there is more to life than one person’s opinion. Well, that could be taken wrong. what if that one person is God? I guess I mean there is more than any one person’s opinion. Even God’s, although you’d probably want to listen to him a bit more than some others, like, the person who said the above quote.

Here are a list of easy contradictions:

Stalkers often think their victim is amazing. Does this make them feel better? Is that all that really matters?
Parents: If your children love you, is that all that really matters? Are you going to be the hip mom wearing velour and giving away drinks to get that love?
I’m sure Eve Braun thought her man was amazing. Do you agree?

“It’s only after we’ve lost everything that we’re free to do anything.”