XXXray
Turns out I might have broken my wrist.
Friday I had to leave work to go visit my doctor in what must be the China town of Pasadena. Actually, it is- Alhambra. My appointment was not until 9:45, which was kind of early for me. Unforatunely it was too early for my doctor, who didn’t show up until 10:30. Seriously, there are some jobs where being late is unacceptable. Doctor is one of them.
Once called into the doctor office, I began to describe my pain to the doc. He insisted on his own little experiments to figure out what was wrong. Saying “twisting motions, like opening a soda bottle” is not clear enough, as he wrenches my hand to the left, right, up, down and other motions unnatural to the human body. Most of them hurt, and I get an “mmhmm.”
“It could be a hyperextension,” he started out. “But it’s probably a break.” Is there a better way to give bad news? Can we have a class for doctors where they learn tact? To be honest, I do like my doctor though. He’s pretty good and knew what he was talking about. Unfortunately that means i’ll probably need a cast :-/
But before they do that, they need xrays!
Xrays are awesome, in theory. I mean, you can see through your body ‘n shit, right? I wish I could see them, but the sign said copies were 20 dollars each. I don’t need copies of my wrist- in a sadder life, that would be my pinup girl.
Aside from wait times, the xrays went quickly. My one complaint is thje safety. This lovely tech has me come into the room and asks me to raise my arms. I thought it was a calisthetic or something, and so I followed. She then put a lead apron around my wasit, perfectly protecting my crotch. I kind of felt like a handy man working on the Sun, or something.
She places my wrist on the xray table, and then leaves the room. I swear to god I hear boulders moving like the 3rd day of Jesus’s death- heavy doors closing in the backgournd somewhere, and then I see the tech’s face distroted through a thick glass window. I’m looking down at my cock-apron thinking, how does this shit protect my junk if she needs to be two rooms and 4 feet of concrete removed from the little machine that goes click.
I’ve got no problem with them looking out for their employees, but there is a fine line between safety for them, and making my balls recoil in fear- making the lead apron that much more effective. That line, on this day, was obliterated.
Oh well, at least i’ve got my health…